Hear my voice, O God, in my prayer; preserve my life from fear of the enemy. (Psalm 64:1)
Now that’s an interesting ask. Not, Protect me from the enemy but from fear of the enemy. Life is threatened by fear.
The Psalm goes on to list all of the stuff that could go wrong, based on the bad guys’ past record. They provoke fear alright, since
They hold fast to their evil purpose, and discuss among themselves how they may lay snares, and say that no one shall see them. (v.5)
Imagine trying to get a good night’s sleep when you know that’s going on. Or at least might be. Which is why you’re praying preserve my life from fear.
The Psalm just before this one is more confident. While Psalm 64 frets about life-threatening fear, Psalm 63 celebrates something better than life,
For your loving-kindness is better than life itself; my lips shall praise you. (63:4)
God’s loving kindness is better than life. Psalm 63 describes wee hours filled with faith instead of fear,
O God, you are my God; early will I seek you…When I remember you on my bed, I meditate on you in the watches of the night. Because you have been my helper, therefore under the shadow of your wings I will rejoice. (verses 1, 7, 8)
There’s stuff that wakes us up. OK, I’ll be a bit transparent — there’s stuff that wakes me up. For whatever reason, 3 a.m. is when it happens. My mind fills with all kinds of unwanted, upcoming stuff, and anxiety is almost too weak a word for it.
My doctor gave me a presecription for “meds” to take before bed. I used ‘em one night, and slept a bit better, but woke up with all the worries unresolved and waiting for me.
By God’s grace, the Holy Spirit started nudging me into prayer during the 3 a.m. sleep disruptions. I started having pillow talk with God. This has not solved all of the problems about which I fret, but it has let me remember the loving kindness that is better than life.
3 a.m. has become a powerful and sometimes welcome, even joyful prayer time for me. And I’m not alone. I have a sister-in-Christ in Africa who frequently drops social media messages that start with something like, Beloved of God, We thank God at this hour of 4am in Uganda…
Using my unplanned awake time to pray brings a number of blessings:
That person I told, “I’ll be praying for you”? All of a sudden I have the time to remember and keep that promise.
That struggle to remember and cram in all of my prayer intentions in the morning rush of shaving, breakfasting and getting dressed for work? Suddenly I am rolling in uninterrupted time to bring my entire prayer list to mind.
Fasting? I realized that 3 a.m. was hours away from breakfast… yep, from breaking the fast. We fast when we sleep, and are in the midst of a fast when awakened. King David seemed to have fasting in mind when he wrote Psalm 63:2 — My soul thirsts for you, my flesh also longs after you, in a barren and dry land where there is no water… David’s fast was rewarded with an awesome spiritual fullness much greater than a pile of pancakes — My soul shall be satisfied, as with marrow and fatness, when my mouth praises you with joyful lips. (verse 6)
I have a number of prayer requests from people who are having trouble with sleep. My 3 a.m. wake ups let me bring their need to mind before grousing about my own. It is a chance to imitate the Lord, the Son of Man who did not come to be served, but to serve… (Matthew 20:28)
Jesus practiced wee-hours prayer in his earthly ministry. And rising very early in the morning, while it was still dark, he departed and went out to a desolate place, and there he prayed. (Mark 1:35)
Heck, the Lord had to get up and go to the desolate place. If you’re one of our tribe of people who wake up worrying, the desolate place comes to you right there in your bed.
But the same God who is there in our good times is the God who is present when we’re afraid of what might go wrong and, more than that, the God who is present with us when they do go wrong. God does not base his presence or absence on our circumstances, but on his awesomeness and love beyond our comprehension:
Even the darkness is not dark to you, and the night is as clear as the day; the darkness and the light to you are both alike. (Psalm 139:11)
…he who keeps you will not sleep… (Psalm 121:3)
My soul clings to you; your right hand has upheld me. (Psalm 63:9)
Let us pray:
Most loving Father, you will us to give thanks for all things, to dread nothing but the loss of you, and to cast all our care on the One who cares for us. Preserve us from faithless fears and worldly anxieties, and grant that no clouds of this mortal life may hide from us the light of that love which is immortal, and which you have manifested unto us in your Son, Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. (Book of Common Prayer 2019, p. 670)
I lost my circadian rhythm from a navy career and usually have to take something to be able to sleep more than 3 hours at a time. It works but this morning for some unknown reason I woke about 0230. Going to try the pillow talk. Thank you, Timothy.